Cross Country Road Trip- USA

8.14.07:

We leave Maine at around 5pm and we are revolted at how disgusting we have become while on this road trip. Our feet were so dirty, and we had tracked the brine and salty lobster water into the carpets of our rental. However, we would become much more disgusting as time would reveal.

Our drive into Wyoming would be thus far, the furthest and most taxing of all the drives we've had so far. Our goal was to fly through the night, switching off in shifts so we could get there in less than 3 days.

It starts to pour. Jen and I were laughing at this guy in an open canvased Jeep that was trying to keep the rain from pelting him by hiding under the sun visor.

Yea, that'll keep you from getting soaked.

Somewhere in the middle of driving through New York, our GPS just totally died and gave out on us. We were dumbfounded and didn't know what to do. We were lucky there was one main highway we needed to be on until we reached South Dakota, but we got so used to relying on the GPS bitch to tell us where to turn and how to think. It also served as a nice little sidekick for the driver to play around with whilst the other slept. Therefore, it was a sad moment.

Luckily, while in Toledo, we are nearby the airport so Jen and I stopped by Budget to see if we could switch our dead GPS for a working one.

We are in luck and we can drive mindlessly once again.

So far, on this trip, though Jen's been the one to get bitten by mosquitoes, I've been the one that has been just dumb unlucky. Or, just dumb.

First, there was that rusted nail I got poked with in New Orleans. Then, came an incident where some cigarette ash flew directly in my eye and I thought I might be temporarily (or permanently) blinded. Then, came the juiciest juice there ever was.

The running joke is that in Ohio, everyone is so fat because even the butter is dipped in lard. As if McDonald's breakfast wasn't greasy enough, they must've soaked our Sausage McMuffin w/ Egg sandwich in a vat of canola oil before frying it on the grill with a stick of butter. While Jen likes to sop up her grease with huge stacks of napkins (that's how greasy the sandwich in Ohio was), I liked to break mine off into pieces with my fingers so that I could savor the small bites. While breaking the sandwich into a 'piece', the juice from the sausage came flying and lands directly at my face. Jen started laughing because everything on this trip thus far, has somehow ended up with me being 'squirted at' in my eye or face. Hence, whilst in Ohio, we would be introduced to what would forever be labeled as the 'porn star sausage'.